5 posts tagged relationship
WARNING: This post is about to get sappy, so feel free to stop reading now!
E and I are celebrating our one year anniversary today! It’s exciting!
I’m currently out of town in New York, but we celebrated this past weekend. E took me on a picnic, complete with baguette, cheese, vino, and cupcakes. And afterward we exchanged gifts.
I got him a bottle of Graham’s port wine. It was a kind we tasted while in Portugal and we both really liked it. And I also got a bunch of Reese’s peanut butter cups, a big mason jar, and garage sale stickers. I wrote down things I love about him, and memories I have from the past year, then slapped them on the back of the Reese’s cups. (I stole this idea from Pinterest, as I am not that clever.)
E got me a beautiful necklace that I’ve been wearing everyday. It’s not in the photo, but you’ll be seeing it soon.
I feel so lucky to have a man like E in my life, and I’m looking forward to the year ahead!
In the inaugural episode of our podcast, we spend our first time telling you about our first times—which just so happen to involve a bus, a burrito, a dorm room, and Boyz II Men. We also debate whether or not Selena Gomez should be charged with statutory rape for deflowering Justin Bieber, and we talk to Classy Ladies Alie Ward and Georgia Hardstark about their Cooking Channel show, as well as what drink is best used in the art of seduction.
Welcome to my podcast!
There are a lot of sexual fetishes I wish I didn’t know about. For example, Plushophilia—or a sexual attraction to teddy bears. (Stay the fuck away from my teddy bear!!!)
Then there are those I wish existed, but to my knowledge do not. These are those wishes…
Oh, what’s that? You’re turned on by the idea of destroying all my enemies with your beastly hands?!
That sounds like maybe the sexiest thing ever, boo.
PS- That’s a hot ass braid you got on.
I define this as the ability to only become aroused after giving me a marathon massage. Say, 5-7 hours in length wherein the only words uttered include, “Turn over” and “Is this hard enough”?
Also, those are unintentionally sexual but ripe for fetishism, no?!
What do women want? Ryan Gosling. When do we want him? Now.
Quite frankly, I’m not sure why more straight men aren’t modeling themselves after the Adonis that is the Gosling. If I were a straight dude I would have a fetish for this man that was borderline in need of a restraining order, and you know what? I’d get chicks. I’d get them ALL.
Incidentally, if you are the man who created these “How To Look Like Ryan Gosling” videos, I applaud you and humbly request that you contact me post haste.
Maybe you’re a man who can only achieve orgasm after purchasing a destination vacation home and you want me right there with you. I don’t know!!!
All I’m saying is that while others might judge you, I wouldn’t stop you from doing this. No, boo, I’d understand your needs and encourage them. I’d help you seek out new areas of the world to pillage and mark with your sexually deviant appetite.
Classified Ad would read:
Desperately seeking a man who finds that watching a woman eat an entire bowl of spaghetti and meatballs is stimulating.
Should agree with Sophia Loren when she said, “Everything you see I owe to pasta.”
Please reply with A/S/L.
Did I miss anything??
Last night I went to dinner with two of my girlfriends, one of whom had just had a terrible fight with her boyfriend. Well, fight may be too strong of a word here. Essentially, the subject of abortion came up, and they happened to land on different sides of the To Kill or Not To Kill equation.
One of my friends was quick to say, “That could be a dealbreaker conversation.” Admittedly, I bristled, and shot back, “Really? That would break up a relationship?”
It was hard for me to understand how talking about the subject of abortion would destroy everything else that’s good. I immediately thought of my parents: My mom, who is Irish Catholic and strongly pro-life, versus my father, who is a doctor and believes it’s a woman and a doctor’s right to choose what happens. They have been happily married for 30 years, and I know for a fact that the subject of abortion has come up - mainly because I have asked for them to explain their opinions to me. They agree to disagree and it hasn’t been a “dealbreaker” issue.
My friend then explained that it would end their relationship if my friend were to get pregnant and actually do something about it (i.e. abort mission). I mean… sure. I could see that being a problem, hypothetically. But for now there is no baby, there is no issue to deal with, so, aren’t you allowed to talk about those things without having to worry about hurting the other person’s feelings?
Do I disagree with what my friend was saying? No. But there are so many “What if!!!’ situations that could come up. For example, (and I have actually thought about this), when I become a mother, say my child is murdered (yes, I took this to a dark place, get ready!), would I want the death penalty to be enforced? Yes. If my husband was against it, that would, hypothetically, suck. But that hasn’t happened to me yet. Hopefully, I will never be put in that situation. It’s all a hypothetical and a WHAT IF sitch, so, shouldn’t I be allowed to discuss that late at night when my boyfriend is trying to fall asleep and all I can think about is "I wonder what his thoughts are on the death penalty…”?
People, and my girlfriends in particular, seem to be extremely cautious when it comes to what they’re allowed to bring up with their boyfriends. I’ve noticed this propensity to avoid certain subjects in favor of keeping the peace. However, I also understand that kind of thinking: Make love not war. Why fight when you can just make out instead? But is all of this coddling and tip-toeing doing women any favors? It seems to me that by not expressing what you’re thinking, and avoiding not having any opinions of your own, you’re doing exactly that. Sending men the message that you are agreeable and don’t think for yourself. Doesn’t that sound… I dunno, kinda silly?
Let it be noted gentleman, THIS is how you end things with a lady.