Dare I say that my boyfriend has rape eyes?
(via fuckyeahjoshgroban)
I have a bucket list. Because I’m an aging pedophile named Jack Nicholson/Morgan Freeman.
Some of these things will be crossed off soon, while others may take some time… here’s how it’s shaping up.
1- Swim with sharks
2- Hike in Alaska
3-Host SNL
4- Walk across the Great Wall of China
5- Perform standup (Signed. Sealed. Delivered.)
6- Write a book
7- Write a play
8- Visit Cinque Terre
9- Learn Italian
10- Learn how to make sushi
11- Go to a restaurant and buy dinner for a random family (anonymously)
12- Start a foundation
13- Volunteer in India
14- See the Taj Mahal
15- Meet my boyfriend (Josh Groban)
16- Feed a village in Africa
17- Sing a song with a live band in front of an audience
18- Party at the Playboy mansion
19- Write an article for The New Yorker
20- Be on NPR
21- Walk in a protest
22- Win an award for teaching
23- Go to Paris for a weekend. Tell no one.
24- Go to the Oscars
25- Be a guest on the Tonight Show
26- Get a PhD
27- Ring the bell at the NYSE
28- Help build a house
29- Go camping
30- Skinny dip
31- Sky dive
32- Travel through wine country
33- Go to the X Games (GOT TICKETS!)
34- Go to the Olympics
35- Go to the Superbowl
36- Go to the World Series
37- Have a sketch on Funny or Die
38- Teach my mom how to swim (she refuses to learn. I am determined).
39- Go apple picking
40- Have a sandwich named after me
41- Learn the thriller dance
42- Be on a float in a parade (I rode in a cop car during a parade as a prize for winning a slogan contest. Doesn’t count.)
43- Mardi Gras in New Orleans
44- Carnival in Brazil
45- Zip line in Costa Rica
46- Go to Sundance
47- Build a successful website (this one?)
48- Go on a yoga retreat
49- Have/be on a billboard in Times Square
50- Interview a polygamist
51- Ride in a car with a storm chaser
52- Visit and bet on the Kentucky Derby
53- Get a tattoo
54- Complete the Sunday NYT’s crossword puzzle
55- Learn how to play chess
56- Take a photography class
57-Visit Forks with Gabby and Kristen, go on Twilight tour
58-Bike across America
59- See a moose in the wild
60- Go to a speakeasy in NYC
61- Make dinner for friends once a month (STARTED)
62- Make Thanksgiving dinner
63- Be backstage at the Hollywood bowl
